StallmanFacts.com

Facts archive

Richard Stallman doesn't need sudo. I will make him a sandwich anyway. # Votes: 371

Richard Stallman never showers: he runs 'make clean'. # Votes: 349

When Richard Stallman makes a sudo command, he loses permissions. # Votes: 340

Some people check their computers for viruses. Viruses check their computers for Richard Stallman. # Votes: 173

Richard Stallman released his own DNA under GNU FDL. # Votes: 131 Submited by Alex

Richard Stallman's compiler is afraid to report errors. # Votes: 114

Richard Stallman solved the travelling salesman problem by making everything free. # Votes: 108 Submited by bhrgunatha

Richard Stallman doesn't use web browsers, he sends a link to a demon that uses wget to fetch the page and sends it back to him. # Votes: 95

Richard Stallman doesn't wget, Richard Stallman wdemands! # Votes: 83

Richard Stallman takes notes in binary. # Votes: 82

Whenever Richard Stallman points at a Windows computer, it segfaults. # Votes: 75

Richard Stallman wrote a program that divides by zero. # Votes: 69

Richard Stallman can coerce meaningful data from /dev/null. # Votes: 65

Richard Stallman can touch MC Hammer # Votes: 64

Richard Stallman wrote the compiler God used. The Big Bang was the Universe's first segfault. # Votes: 64

Richard Stallman can make infinite loops end. # Votes: 64

Richard Stallman spends his leasure time playing Duke Nukem Forever on GNU Hurd. # Votes: 64

RMS doesn't code, he just travel around the world. # Votes: 62 Submited by alucardni

Richard Stallman wrote a program so powerful, it knows the question to 42. # Votes: 61 Submited by C-dong Brawnhard

Richard Stallman is the only man alive who can pronounce GNU the way it is meant to be pronounced. # Votes: 59

Richard Stallman first words were actually syscalls. # Votes: 55

Richard Stallman's beard is made of parentheses. # Votes: 52

If Richard Stallman has 1GB of RAM, and if you have 1GB of RAM, Richard Stallman has more RAM than you. # Votes: 51

Richard Stallman discovered extra-terrestrial life but killed them because they used closed-source software. # Votes: 45

Richard Stallman wrote the first version of Emacs using Emacs. # Votes: 44 Submited by Boromir

Richard Stallman's nervous system is completely wireless. # Votes: 40

Stallman knows of an unfixed bug in TeX. # Votes: 39 Submited by Troels Henriksen

Richard Stallman never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. # Votes: 39 Submited by Yoshio

Richard Stallman anti-virus programs cures HIV # Votes: 36

Richard Stallman gets 9 bits to the byte. # Votes: 33

Richard Stallman's DNA is in binary. # Votes: 33

Richard Stallman's left and right hands are named "(" and ")" # Votes: 32

Richard Stallman's laser pointer is a lightsaber # Votes: 31 Submited by bisio

Richard Stallman can write an anti-virus program that cures HIV. Too bad he never writes anti-virus programs. # Votes: 31 Submited by DacholaEtecoon

Richard Stallman wrote the HAL9000 OS # Votes: 30 Submited by bisio

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Richard Stallman instead instantiated himself polymorphically. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard. # Votes: 30

Richard Stallman will never die, it goes to /dev/null # Votes: 30 Submited by Paulo Braga

Richard Stallman is licensed under GPL, so you can clone him and redistribute copies so you can help your neighbor. For example a version that take a bath more often. # Votes: 29 Submited by Matarese

In Soviet Russia, Richard Stallman is still Richard Stallman! # Votes: 27

Stallman can determine whether an arbitrary program will terminate. # Votes: 27 Submited by Troels Henriksen

Global warming is caused by Richard Stallman’s rage toward Windows Vista # Votes: 26

Richard Stallman wrote the first version of EMACS on a typewriter. # Votes: 26 Submited by Jacob Lee

Richard Stallman's uptime is over 53 years. And counting up. # Votes: 25 Submited by RG

When Richard Stallman uses floats, there are no rounding errors. # Votes: 23 Submited by a2800276

Richard Stallman needs neither mouse nor keyboard to operate his computer. He just stares it down until it does what he wants. # Votes: 22

Richard Stallman was coded by himself in lisp with emacs. # Votes: 22 Submited by zobi8225

Richard Stallman don't cut his hair because there is no GNU/Scissors # Votes: 21 Submited by GM

All your base are belong to Richard Stallman. # Votes: 20

For Richard Stallman, polynomial time is O(1). # Votes: 20

Richard Stallman can produce food on his foot! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I25UeVXrEHQ#t=1m46s # Votes: 20 Submited by fito

rms' facial hair is "free as in beard" # Votes: 19 Submited by thugbonnet

Richard Stallman can write /dev/null full. # Votes: 19 Submited by Joner Cyrre Worm

Richard Stallman wrote a program to compute the last digit of pi. # Votes: 18

Richard Stallman proved P=NP, twice! # Votes: 18 Submited by SA

Richard Stallman doesn't read web pages. They write to him. # Votes: 17

Richard Stallman's brain accepts UNIX commands. # Votes: 17

Richard Stallman wrote the compiler God used. The Big Bang was the Universe's first segfault. # Votes: 17

Richard Stallman's computer doesn't have a clock, it defines what time it is. # Votes: 17

Richard Stallman doesn't eat McDonald's because the machine that kills the cows uses privative software. # Votes: 17 Submited by Rodolfo

Richard Stallman does not own a mobile phone because he can fashion a crude convex dish and shout into it at the exact resonant frequency of the ozone, causing a voice to seemingly come from the sky above his intended recipient. # Votes: 16

Richard Stallman successfully compiled a kernel of popcorn. # Votes: 16

There's no chin under Richard Stallman's beard, only another Emacs. # Votes: 16

Richard Stallman doesn’t code. He dares the computer to not do his bidding. # Votes: 15

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects RMS could use to write an OS, including the room itself. # Votes: 15 Submited by yourself

Richard Stallman's flute only plays free music. # Votes: 14

There is no software development process, only a bunch of programs RMS allows to exist. # Votes: 13

When Richard Stallman pipes to more, he gets less # Votes: 13

When you make a Google search and it don't find the answer, Google gently ask's Stallman for. # Votes: 13 Submited by Demostenes

Richard Stallman eats ethernet cables. That's why they invented wireless. # Votes: 12

RMS doesn't use an editor, he sets the fundamental constants of the universe so that a magnetic platter with his code on it evolves itself. # Votes: 12 Submited by Masio

Richard Stallman's distributed version control system is a flamewar on usenet. # Votes: 12 Submited by largos

"They can take our lives, but they can never take our freedom." Willian Wallace after a litle talk with Stallman. # Votes: 12 Submited by Jayr Motta

Richard Stallman is so zelous about privacy he has /dev/null as his home. # Votes: 12 Submited by Joner Cyrre Worm

When Richard Stallman runs /bin/false, it returns "true". # Votes: 12 Submited by Joner Cyrre Worm

RMS doesn't maintain code, he stares at it until it fixes itself out of reverence. # Votes: 11 Submited by Masio

Stallmans computer has only two buttons. One is for guests. # Votes: 11 Submited by Troels Henriksen

When Richard Stallman gets pissed off he doesn't swear, he recurses. # Votes: 11

Richard Stallman is my shephurd, and I am his GNU. # Votes: 10

Ricahrd Stallman doesn't use zip drives, he just squeezes the hard drive. # Votes: 10

Richard Stallman doesn't write programs, they write themselves out of reverence. # Votes: 10

Some people wear Linus Torvalds pyjama's to bed, Linus Torvalds wears RMS pyjama's. # Votes: 10

On RMS's computer the bootloader is contained in his .emacs. # Votes: 10

Richard Stallman programmed Chuck Norris # Votes: 10 Submited by Igor Azevedo

Richard Stallman memorises all his documents. In binary. He just types everything in whenever he needs a document. # Votes: 9

Richard Stallman didn't create the singularity. He is the singularity. Gnu/Linux is only the event horizon. # Votes: 9

RMS knows the entire wikipedia by heart, markup included # Votes: 9 Submited by bisio

RMS never steps down, he shifts the universe up . # Votes: 9 Submited by Masio

Stallman can write a context-free grammar for C. # Votes: 9 Submited by Troels Henriksen

Stallman has no known weaknesses, except for a phobia against soap. # Votes: 9 Submited by GhostofVA

Behind Richard Stallman's beard there is another fist, to code faster. # Votes: 9 Submited by Yanoi

Richard Stallman's brain compiles and run C code. # Votes: 9 Submited by souzacds

Stallman does not actually write programs. He comes up with a length and digit index in pi. # Votes: 8 Submited by Troels Henriksen

Vendor lock-in is when vendors lock themselves inside of a building out of fear of Richard Stallman's wrath. # Votes: 8 Submited by yourself

Stallman is a Matrix software that born proprietary, but him rewrote itself in GPL. First him rewrote his hands, because wanted be rewritten with hands free. # Votes: 8 Submited by semente

Richard Stallman has a katana. 'Nuff said. # Votes: 7

Richard Stallman didn't "write" emacs or created it in his own image. Richard Stallman made Emacs an instance of himself. # Votes: 7

Richard Stallman called his operating system GNU because he created it before computers existed, when actual Gnus were used for calcuations. # Votes: 7

Stallman doesn't evaluate expressions, expressions evaluate to Stallman # Votes: 7 Submited by Clang

Richard Stallman can get *nine* bits in a byte if he wanted to. # Votes: 7 Submited by Roman

When Richard Stallman executes ps -e, you show up. # Votes: 7

Richard Stallman once got swine flu, but it got contaminated by viral GPL and thus got assimilated. # Votes: 7 Submited by garoa

Richard Stallman can connect to any brain using an emacs ssh client. # Votes: 7 Submited by R. Erbano

Richard Stallman does not contribute to open source projects, open source projects contribute to Richard Stallman. # Votes: 7 Submited by Lars

Richad Stallman's pinky finger is really a USB memory stick. # Votes: 6

Richard Stallman can solve the halting problem... in polynomial time. # Votes: 5

Richard Satallman can make any operating system free, from drivers. # Votes: 5 Submited by Paulo Dias

Richard Stallman won a Suduku that started with only one number in each line # Votes: 5 Submited by souzacds

RMS, upon reading this website, didn't laughed at all. Instead, he complained that he is being linked to those dirty "open source" software. He also asked it to be changed to "free software", in order to raise awareness for software freedom in our society. # Votes: 5 Submited by Elias Amaral

Richard Stallman has no problem using emacs. He wrote it with his 4 hands. # Votes: 5 Submited by goalieca

Richard Stallman will revert the big rip by adding parenthesis to the dark matter. # Votes: 5 Submited by RG

Stallman is the one who trims Chuck Norris beard. And he does it for free, of course. # Votes: 5 Submited by Rodrigo

Richard Stallman ported emacs to intel 4004 chip. # Votes: 5 Submited by R. Erbano

There is no Windows in Stallman's house.. just DOORs... # Votes: 5 Submited by ZeReis

Richard Stallman is not affected by Godwin's Law. # Votes: 4 Submited by Eric

Richard Stallman does not take bath for the hydroelectric use proprietary software # Votes: 4 Submited by beto

Richard Stallman did not write GNU Emacs, he simply read the source code from /dev/null. # Votes: 4 Submited by Lars

Richard Stallman was installed in the world, it runs on a free program .. # Votes: 4 Submited by kelvim

Richard Stallman didn't write the GPL. He is the GPL. # Votes: 3

Rms user TAR to compress air. # Votes: 3 Submited by Jefferson Daniel

Richard Stallman is so handsome that when he was young he was responsible for all other geeks not being able to get girls. This is why he has to cover his face with a thick layer of hair. # Votes: 2

There is no chin behind RMS's legendary beard, there is only another Emacs. # Votes: 2 Submited by Roman

Richard Stallman once used GDB to reverse-engineer Windows 7 into an open source operating system - able to run on GNU Emacs! # Votes: 2 Submited by Lars

When Stallman report a bug, your inbox that receive it. # Votes: 2 Submited by Kim Pastro

Richard Stallman doesn’t like neither PCs-Intel nor Burger King.. He prefers e-Macs… # Votes: 2 Submited by ZeReis

Richard Stallman Ipod plays OGG and WMA # Votes: 1 Submited by Paulo Braga

We like to think he is our friend to think that he isn't our master. # Votes: 1 Submited by Jayr Motta

Richard Stallman programmed himself before he can even exist # Votes: 1 Submited by Igor Azevedo

Richard Stallman doesn't really believe in open software, because he actually owns everything. # Votes: 0

Richard Stallman can leave neutral or negative feedback on eBay. # Votes: 0

Richard Stallman can see Russia from his house # Votes: 0 Submited by Tom

Richard stallman is not a person, in fact he's two pesons, they borned Conjoined twins and get separate at age of 18 , this is the explanation of the "share" filosophy. # Votes: 0 Submited by Jonathan

The agent Smith loves Richard Stallman's smell # Votes: 0 Submited by Paulo Brito

He is the choosen one. # Votes: 0 Submited by Jayr Motta

Richard Stallman don't like money, because the government doesn't open the source code, but use because Chuck Norris said to like. # Votes: 0 Submited by Edson Ribeiro da Silva